|| And while I'm in the mood for it:
||Mar. 25th, 2004 07:36 am|
1) There is NOT "always one more space" on a tube train. Fuck off and wait for the next one.|
2) Diving through a closing tube door and either a) manfully heaving it open or b) bowling over the pensioner standing inside it is NOT FUCKING CLEVER. Your waiting another 3 minutes does not just compensate for 200 people (what's the capacity of a tube train?) waiting another 30 seconds each.
3) And as for the twats who walk through between carriages (optionally carrying infants) while the train is pelting along underground, GET A FUCKING CLUE. No-one wants to pick your corpse up off half a mile of tunnel, and if I'm standing in my usual position in the end doorway, YOU WILL NOT PASS.
4) Where the hell are all the fire extinguishers on the tube? Are they actually allowed to run them with ALL the extinguishers missing?
5) To those who insist on going round the passanger tunnels the wrong way: What makes *you* so fucking special? Can you not appreciate the simple reasons for directional flow in the footways?
6) If you are standing in the middle of the side door and it opens onto a platform, and people want to get off, STEP OFF THE BLOODY TRAIN. Much as you might have the charm and wit of a metal beam, you are NOT immovable, and I will prove this if need be.
etc) insert template rants here about graffiti, litter, alcoholics, touts, etc, etc.
This rant brought to you by far too many clueless fuckwits, the time 07:36, and a complete lack of imagination in expletives.
Oh and PS; the stairs may well say "emergency use only", but then you haven't been inside my head in a crowded lift. And I'm fit enough to use them.
Eva, Vicki and myself were on a tube back to Victoria a while back (This was post pub iirc... or was it post party? one or the other) and there were a bunch of twats on the tube that thought it'd be funny to shooting off the fire extinguisher at each other. in addition to occasionally misting over us, it smelt rank...
Agree on all other points btw.
You have my sympathy on this one, I used to dread having to use the tube during rush hour.
May I impart the following as some form of enlightenment/answer to your observations/questions
4)As Ash pointed out Fire Extinguishers do tend to attract Fuckwits, I guess London Transport's view is that the cost of re-filling all the extinguishers that had been irresponsibly let off wasn't worth it, at least I hope that's the anwser, anything else is to scary to think about.
5)These people go through life counting the nano-seconds, they've somehow worked out that no matter what, if they go down a passenger tunnel the wrong way they'll have shaved 2 secs of their journey time or it will put them in a better position on the platform so they can get in to a particular carriage. This view has blinded them to the fact that more often than not a time saving is lost due to the fact that they are trying to fight their way past 50+ people going in the opposite direction.
6) These people are the most paranoid of tube travellers, they will not move further inside the carriage even when there is space. This is because they believe that they will become trapped there when the tube fills up with other travellers who don't move to let people off the train. They will also not step off the train to let someone get past them for fear that they'll never get back on again.
I would partly argue against (1) in that occasionally there would be room for one more if the idiots standing in the middle of the aisle of the carriage actually moved down instead of leaving a meter gap between them and the next person. Now I understand that some people get panicky if they don't have enough space, but if the person is aware of this they should not be trying to use the tube at rush hour. Surprising at it may seem, there are other transport methods in London.
Hrm, I do commit violation #5 on your list, at the station near duranorak
's house... although I wouldn't do it if it was in any busy sort of period. I'm generally one of about 2 or 3 people using the elevator there though, so I don't think I'm going to round a corner and find a tidal wave of people coming towards me whose path I'm blocking.
I'm really not looking forward to commuting with a freshly healed leg, I suspect it's going to be a bit on the nerve-wracking side.